The Reddings Are Coming

They aren't exactly the British, but my family is coming to Korea.  

It isn't going to be as much of an invasion, more a long overdue visit and look into my life; but I feel ok in saying that my nerves are at a level similar to those the American first settlers felt when they were preparing to fight for their freedom.

Big comparison I know.  But in a sense… this visit is a declaration of freedom for me.

Not really freedom, "freedom" isn't the right word, but what's associated with freedom is correct.  Mainly the feeling of independence - a feeling of acceptance, a belief that you're on your own now and that they feel you will do all right.

And that leads to an even more troubling issue of why I need that acceptance.  Especially at 27-freaking-years-old!  Surely by now I should be confident in myself and who I've become to not hang on the shirttails of my parents, waiting for them to pat me on the head and tell me I've done good.

I'm not.  I don't need a pat on the head.  

But what I want from this visit is for my parents to see my life, see how I'm doing, how I'm… doing OK!

For the most part, I don't think my parents understood a lot of what I've done in my life.  In terms of alignment for the future it's all been a swirling, jagged, zigzagging line towards... something; but it has allowed me to go to some pretty incredible places!  Which again would be things I don't think my parents initially understood (Africa, wandering, being idealess for the future, nannying, working in a dog shop, and eventually Korea), but my parents supported these things and didn't prohibit me from going.

Note: my parents are awesome.  I don't think they would ever stop me from doing anything.  But that's not the point.  The point is not about stopping me, but not understanding me.  And that's where I'm going with all of this rambling.

I want my parents to understand me.  To know that although I might have come to Korea with little more than an idea that it would be "cool", I'm now doing great.  And that this life that I jumped into, that I choose because "why not" has turned into an experience, a moment, a huge part of my life that has been/is really good for me.

I want them to see that, to see Korea and to get it.  

But this visit isn't just a trip to Korea.  It is a grand Asian adventure for them filled with non-stop sights throughout China (before Korea) and Japan (after).  No knocking my new home country, but I can't say many people put Korea on their list of desired tourist destinations.

How are they supposed to get it when they are coming/going to all of that?  How are they supposed to understand?  Even I love Japan more than Korea!!?!

I don't know if this rant went anywhere, but the Reddings are coming and I'm nervous.